The Wide Angle: Don’t believe the warm weather

Published 5:16 pm Tuesday, March 12, 2024

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It’s March 12 as I put these disjointed thoughts to paper and if the weather forecasters are to be believed, Tuesday was supposed to be sunny with highs in the 60s.

I don’t like it.

It’s not that the nice, warm weather isn’t enjoyable, it’s just — not normal. I’ve gone over and over how much I adore winter and I’m more than comfortable with the idea you may think I took a wide stride off the turnip wagon so we won’t go into this fascination I have with the season.

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Instead, I will delve into how much I don’t trust this weather. We may very well have nice, warm temperatures moving forward (though it does little to cushion the drought we’re currently dealing with), but I’ve lived in Minnesota long enough to understand that this time of year can’t be trusted.

Though probably not to this degree, we have had unseasonably warm weather in the past. In fact, the record high for Tuesday in 2016 was 65 degrees. That wasn’t too long ago and only one example in recent history where Mother Nature gave us a reprieve from the snow so many of the rest of you have been annoyed with.

And I get it. You all want to get outside, take a walk, get in the garden, chase a small ball with a club across a giant backyard. I want to do those things as well — except golf. I’ll never buy into that. Just my preference.

Personally, I’m looking at my garden and thinking about what will go into this year and if the Austin Fire Chief Jim McCoy will consent to sending over one of his trucks every so often to deliver the amount of water I just know it will need.

Still, Mother Nature just isn’t trustworthy this time of year. We still have half of March and April and that’s a lot of time to give us mild, early spring like conditions, only to follow it up with a dump of snow just as we all put our snowblowers away.

She’s kind of mean that way, and it’s never the light, fluffy stuff. The snow that falls this time of year is the thick, wet snow that after a half an inch makes it impossible to shovel by hand.

I like my spine where it is thank you very much.

This is how it inevitably goes. Nice weather, nice weather, back-breaking labor for an hour — give or take depending on your layout — nice weather, dirty vehicle, washed vehicle, roughly 540 days of rain, stupid-hot.

That, of course, is a rough breakdown and does not represent the entire span of two months leading into summer. Some years, stupid-hot doesn’t really settle in until late June.

I don’t like stupid-hot.

I grant you that it’s an unscientific metric of defining the months of March, April and maybe even May. I was just talking with a friend the other day and we reminisced about a recent dump we received in May.

And, AND, it should be noted that while I like snow and winter, I don’t like being drawn into a lull of false security where I do get acclimated to the warm weather, only to wake up and look at 130 inches of snow staring at me from outside.

It then becomes a hassle to trudge to the garage, past the grill I’ve already used a couple times in some silent mockery of spring, and rearrange the freshly cleaned garage in order to wrestle the snowblower out of its spot.

Huh, maybe that’s why I haven’t cleaned the garage yet.

On top of that, that the snow will be gone in a few days anyway so really, a person can’t be blamed for not just throwing their hands up and screaming, “what’s the point?”

The point, dear faithful reader, is that this time of year is not to be trusted, as I’ve rambled on about. I recommend walking around on 70 degree days wearing a thick coat and stocking hat — just in case. Weather this time of year can turn on a dime. You might as well be a conversation topic for others while remaining prepared.