QUESTION: If you were to identify the things that adults do that are in the best interests of their children, what would they be?

ANSWER: Children thrive when the life-styles of the adults around them are positive and energizing. If you’re doing these eight things, the kids in your life are on solid ground:

When you gather together with friends and family, to eat or socialize, talk about the things you are grateful for: family milestones, supportive friends, successful accomplishments at work, opportunities to learn something new, problems that have been solved.

Think about the world beyond your home and workplace. Be aware of your own strengths, talents, skills and advantages and spend some time sharing yourself with others.

Minimize your financial worries by living within your means. Make choices that challenge impulsive buying and immediate gratification. Learn to plan ahead and celebrate a bargain. If you have a surplus, give some of it away. (He who knows he has enough is rich.)

Share experiences, not just things. Remember that gifts are no substitute for relationship.

Enjoy small pleasures. An agony of those who are addicted is the inability to enjoy the repeated small pleasures and rewards of normal living.

Avoid unnecessary competition. Value the process as much as the product. Cooperate with other people. Expanding your range and increasing your depth may be more valuable than reaching the top.

Consider your priorities. Contemplate what you want to accomplish over your lifetime as well as what you need to do in the next few weeks. Think of your calendar as representing your life, not just your obligations.

Focus on something spiritual every day. Internal strength and emotional stability come from spiritual wisdom, not physical activity or a high I.Q.

If you would like to talk with a parenting specialist about the challenges in raising children, call the toll-free Parent WarmLine at 1-888-584-2204/Línea de Apoyo at 877-434-9528. For free emergency child care call Crisis Nursery at 1-877-434-9599. Check out www.families andcommunities.org.