Hello, I am Futurebook, cousin of the now popular Facebook. I needed to stop by and let you know why most of you cannot find good jobs. What is that? You do not need jobs because you have more than 500 Facebook friends? Plus, money is the root of all evil, and you can just live on love?

Those are both sweet sentiments but both are false.

You do need money to survive and both love and popularity will dwindle every time you borrow money to buy anything. You cannot live at Mom and Dad’s house forever.

So it is now established that you will need money.

The best way to get money is to work.

To work, you need a job. If you can remember back about 120 words or so, I stated I am here to let you know why many of you cannot find jobs. In a nutshell, it’s my cousin’s fault. Actually, it is not Facebook’s fault alone, but I thought it would be smart to tell you that because no one really likes to blame themselves, and it was a way to keep you reading. Blaming Facebook for the way someone uses it is as dumb as Kentucky Fried Chicken creating the double-down to help people lose weight.

Facebook can be a great thing in social media, but to help with that eventually-finding-a-job-thing, please do not:

1. Put photos of yourself in compromising situations, such as:

• Holding liquor or even worse — drugs, especially if you are under 21.

• Doing anything illegal. If you need to know what is illegal, please ask a police officer or Google “illegal stuff.”

• Being naked.

• Telling people they are No. 1 with a certain finger.

2. Post swear words or curse and complain about your employer. It amazes me how many people are posting about their current jobs “sucking” while they are actually supposed to be doing that job. Please do not think your bosses are stupid. You are showing everyone how unintelligent you are. Oh, by the way — good luck at your next review or the next time you are looking at moving up in the company. Think, baby, think!

Futurebook thinks that stopping and counting until 10, and then waiting a day until you post something that might be dangerously close to any of the above is a smart idea. Not posting is an even better idea.

Remember, even though Facebook has rules, Consumer Reports recently reported that about 7.5 million Facebook users in the U.S. are under the age of 13, and about 5 million are under the age of 10.

Here are a few Futurebook rules to to keep your children safe on social networks:

1. Parents should know the login password and have access to their child’s page.

2. An e-mail of new posts, added friends, etc. should come to the family’s home email address.

3. Parents should consider having an account on Facebook themselves, and children should be expected to add and keep their parents as “friends.”

4. Children should not add strangers as friends, or use the Facebook “chat” application to talk to strangers.

5. Parents should set a limit on the time that children are allowed on Facebook.

6. The computer should be kept in a common area of the house, such as a living room or play room, where it will always be in easy view.

7. Children should never share personal information (address, phone number, pictures, etc.) with anyone on Facebook.

8. Children should immediately tell their parents if they see anything or talk to anyone on Facebook that makes them uncomfortable; and parents should take immediate action to block or report that material.

Facebook — and other social media — is not going away anytime soon, so please be smart.

Scott Schmeltzer is the publisher of the Albert Lea Tribune. His column runs weekly.