The Wide Angle: Like Rocky Balboa, I have a heart on fire

Published 11:17 am Saturday, February 17, 2018

Lately, Rocky Hulne, our intrepid sports writer, and I have been discussing ways to make our jobs more exciting.

Not that our jobs aren’t exciting. We get to cover more than a few great teams, hang out with some fantastic kids, get to know the adults behind those kids, so on and so forth. But sometimes, there are off nights and on those off nights, when we’re not listening to conspiracy videos on YouTube, we’re dreaming up ways of becoming more epic.

“Epic” is a fine word and sums up the highest standards of the word “cool.” If you’re epic — good or bad — then you are on a plane of existence far above the normal, everyday cool people. Epic denotes a passage of time where your deeds transcend space and time.

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Granted, I’ve had some epic moments, but I’ve also had some epic failings, probably more so the latter lending me a certain ability to deal with the bad better than the good. But that’s a different story.

We think we’ve hit on the master stroke. Montages. Specifically 80s movie montages.

First, a bit on 80s movies. The 80s, if you grew up in them as I did, have quite a bit one doesn’t like to remember. An overabundance of pastel-colored clothes, some horrible synthesized music and gigantic hair the likes of which you have rarely seen, requiring a staggering amount of hairspray.

But the movies. Oh, man the movies were on a whole different level. You had the golden age of rom-coms, romantic comedies like, “Pretty in Pink,” and “Can’t Buy Me Love.” Wild and over-the-top action movies with implausible plot lines, a ridiculous amount of explosions and heroes with muscles bigger than your head. Straight up comedies, like “Beverly Hills Cop” and “Ghostbusters.” I mean these were the movies that defined a generation. There were no “Fifty Shades of Gray,” but there was “Nine and a Half Weeks.”

What movies during this time were really known for though, were the montages. Thirty seconds to minute long clips of movie scenes flashing back-to-back all the while being serenaded by some epic song that was guaranteed to stay with you for the rest of your life and every time you heard that song you were guaranteed to think of those pivitol scenes.

The “Rocky” movies by far had some of the best montages ever put to film. It’s almost like somebody sat down, thought up the montages and then thought that they had better have a movie around said montages.

Probably the best was “Rocky IV.”

“Rocky IV,” was the 80s. In a decade that had America fighting the Russians on all fronts, including the movies, “Rocky IV” stood above them all in such a patriotic display of boxing you’re every seen. From the moment Carl Weathers’ Apollo Creed enters on a massive float to a live stage presentation of “Living in America,” by James Brown to Rocky defeated Ivan Drago in Russia, ultimately being swaddled in the American flag and the Russian fans chanting his name. AMMMEEERRRICCCCAAAA!

In one hour and a half nation-loving movie, one boxer defeated Russia and America stood on top. The 80s were truly epic.

But for me, it was the montages that really set the stage. Rocky IV had two very significant montages, each with their own dedicated song. Spoiler alert: When Drago punches the life out of Apollo Creed, Sylvester Stallone’s Rocky is devastated. The two men, who started out in the beginning an adversaries, had since turned into boxing bros. Rocky mulled on it, his family life taking a hit and so he gets into his suped up sports car. The camera snaps from frame to frame of Rocky opening a car door, his face long and haggard, the tail lights coming on, a pensive Rocky, the headlights popping up.

This is all done to early and persistent drum beat of Robert Tepper’s “No Easy Way Out.” The tone is set. Throughout the drive he takes during the song, Rocky sees flashes of Drago, flashes of Apollo. Flashes of intensity are seen in the rearview mirror as Rocky struggles to figure out what to do next and could he have prevented anything.

He remembers the past and he doesn’t come to believe, “There is no shortcut home.”

It’s a pivotal scene and in all seriousness sets the tone for the rest of the movie. In that one moment of cinematic history, Rocky’s course is set on a collision course with the evil Russian. The montage is a perfect segue to the next part of the movie.

The second montage though is quite possibly the best in all the 80s. The training montage.

This one should be played in every weight room or gym 24 hours a day. Rocky is in Russia and the montage switches between Drago’s high tech, scientific training and Rocky’s rustic training based from a cabin in the wilds of Russia.

It starts serenely enough. Rocky steps out of the cabin on a bright, early morning. It’s cold. You can tell because there is snow.

He loosens up as the piano keys of the song slowly pick up speed until the synths start to kick in and the montage switches to Drago’s training.

The training mirrors each other showing the different ways they are training. It’s a near constant song of no lyrics.

But suddenly, surprise, the montages becomes more intense as John Cafferty & The Beaver Brown Band’s  “Hearts on Fire,” takes hold. Holy cow, I’m ready to take on the Russians.

This is what Rocky and I have decided we need to do. Montages with epic-sounding songs as we take pictures, interview athletes and are shown all in slow motion, because everything is more epic in slow motion.

And when people ask why we’re walking slow, we can turn and look at the camera in dramatic fashion, conveying all the words we need in one stone-cold gaze.

And promptly leave them confused, but its the 80s baby. Logic means very little.