Be loving and realistic for Mother’s Day

Published 7:01 am Sunday, May 8, 2016

QUESTION: So many Mother’s Day cards are so sentimental they don’t seem genuine. Can we be loving and realistic on Mother’s Day?

RESPONSE: Young children have the gift of being both loving and honest, as these comments by second graders, sent to me by a good friend via the internet, make obvious.

Question: How did God make mothers? Answer: God made my mom just the same way he made me. He just used bigger parts.

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Question: What ingredients are mothers made of? Answer: God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.

Question: Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? Answer: God knew she likes me a lot more than other people’s moms like me.

Question: What kind of a little girl was your mom? Answer: They say she used to be nice.

Question: What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? Answer: Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Question: Why did your mom marry your dad? Answer: She got too old to do anything else with him.

Question: Who’s the boss at your house? Answer: Mom doesn’t want to be boss, but she has to because dad’s such a goof ball.

Question: What’s the difference between moms and dads? Answer: Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.

Question: What does your mom do in her spare time? Answer: Mothers don’t do spare time.

Question: What would it take to make your mom perfect? Answer: On the inside she’s already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.

Question: If you could change on thing about your mom, what would it be: Answer: I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

To talk with a parenting specialist about the challenges in child-raising, call the toll-free Parent WarmLine at 1-888-584-2204/Línea de Apoyo at 1-877-434-9528. For free emergency child care call Crisis Nursery at 1-877-434-9599. Check out www.familiesandcommunities.org and the free resources at the Parenting Resource Center Specialty Library (105 First Street SE, Austin).