The chore of connecting stereo wires

Published 7:01 am Sunday, September 20, 2015

It’s funny how what was a fun challenge as a kid can become like pulling teeth as an adult.

I was listening to my stereo recently when half of my speakers went dead mid-song. No big deal, I thought. My stereo system had become a jumbled swamp of cords and lights, so this was just the excuse I need ed to get organized again.

I set aside a nice hour or so on a Sunday afternoon to get the stereo system back in line — to get it all organized and rearranged.

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If only it were that simple.

I thought the problem would be quickly rectified by reconnecting a few speaker wires and adjusting some settings. I flipped around my amplifier to find some of the speaker connections loose. I reconnected them, dusted behind the record player and felt like a regular handyman.

Then I hit play on another album, which started playing at a good volume, a “I had a bad day and need loud music volume.” I turned the volume nob. Nothing. Turned it again. Nothing. Disconnected and reconnected speaker wire. Nothing.

So I started experimenting. Anyone who grew up with any kind of gaming system or home stereo system is likely used to experimenting. Many of us had CD/stereo systems in high school that we tried to jerry-rig into something loud and cool enough to damage our hearing.

As a boy, this sort of thing was a fun puzzle. Or maybe it was sheer determination. Or maybe nostalgia is clouding my memory.

Growing up, I had an old wood-panel television in my room. Today it would be ancient, but at the time it felt like a cool family heirloom. When I finally got a Nintendo 64 for Christmas, I learned the hard way that the TV had no audio-video input. It only had the analog/antenna input. After hunting down adapters at Radioshack, I got it working through an adapter and cord-heavy system that would make MacGyver proud.

I repeated this routine in high school by connecting my dad’s 1970s stereo speakers into my Walmart stereo system, even though it barely had the power to send sound to its two boxed speakers.

Today, the patience isn’t there. After a bit of trying, I admitted defeat and that my amplifier is in need of repairs (which was especially painful after I stumbled on a button in back that improves the sound … even though I couldn’t control the volume).

So, I borrowed a little-used receiver from my parents and got to work connecting it. Then came my next problem. No matter how diligently I tried, I could not get my speaker wires to stay in the unit. When one connected, another always fell out. After much effort, sweat and a few words I can’t repeat in print, I gave up, opting to try again later.

As of writing this column, I still haven’t mustered the courage or energy. What was once fun as a child has become a chore that seems more like climbing a mountain.