The importance of social emotional development

Published 10:26 am Monday, February 10, 2014

Amy Baskin

Director of community education and communication

Social emotional development is a fundamental part of a child’s overall health and well-being. It encompasses how children interact with others and how they manage and cope with adversity and stress throughout their entire life. This development in the early years of life prepares children to be self-confident, compassionate, trusting, competent in using language and more able to relate well with others. Examples of social emotional skills are making friends, showing anger in a healthy way, figuring out conflicts peacefully, waiting patiently and following rules. When children have strong social emotional skills they can be better learners and will do better in school.

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Connecting to others or attachment begins the very first day of life. Nurturing relationships teach children how to calm themselves after stressful events. This regulation of emotions is critical to a child being able to show age appropriate behavior at all stages of life. Parents and caregivers can build nurturing relationships through modeling, encouraging and teaching. Here are some tips on how you can support your child’s social emotional development from birth to three years of age.

Birth-12 months — Babies learn who they are by how they are treated. Everyday interactions send messages that shape a child’s self-esteem. Provide responsive care by knowing your child’s likes and dislikes. Allow them to play, explore and follow their interests. Talk back to them repeating the sounds they make, give them lots of face time, smiles and laughter. Learn what their behavior means and respond appropriately.

12-24 months — This is the year of self-awareness. They are figuring out that they are separate and independent creatures. They can understand that others have thoughts and feelings different from their own. This is the perfect age to teach problem solving. Give them time to figure out a problem on their own without letting them get overly frustrated. When they start to get frustrated give them the help they need to master the challenge. Praise them for doing a good job, trying hard or accomplishing the task.

24-36 months is the age where you child will begin to play interactively with their peers, pretend play and understand the feelings of others. Teach your child to use words to describe their emotions. “I see that you are feeling sad, mad, frustrated angry, happy, silly, etc.” Teaching words for emotions allows them to have the ability to talk about their feelings instead of acting them out.

Children develop social emotional skills over time and in small steps. Additional resources for developing strong, confident children can be found online at www.challengingbehavior.org; http://csefel.vanderbilt.edu; www.zerotothree.org.