It’s more like a jar of jalapenos

Published 6:33 am Thursday, February 11, 2010

Fred Bissen has a birthday Sunday, Valentine’s Day.  He will be 90 years young.

Larry and Cindy Ricke are raising a grandchild.

Larry’s mom, Betty Fischer, still bleeds green and gold for the Green Bay Packers.

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Louis “Tip” Taylor is 90 and getting along quite well while his wife recovers in a nursing home.

Dan Hershberger, furniture-maker and auctioneer, reports his daughter and her husband are safe in Haiti where they are part of a Mennonite mission project.

Galen Holst is still commander of Lyle American Legion Post No.105.  He wishes somebody else would take the job, but as long as duty calls he will answer.

Gary Ziegler has a new Lyle Area Cancer Auction denim shirt. The old one faded, but not his zeal for helping at another cancer research fundraiser.

Behind every face of the people from north Iowa and southern Minnesota, there is a story.  Their stories have happy endings just like cancer survivors do.  They want to do all they can to help the list of survivors grow.

The annual auction each mid-January receives the most attention, but there are 13 separate fundraising activities held throughout the year.  This year they earned $119,000 for the 2010 5th District Minnesota Eagles Cancer Research Telethon.

The telethon raised between $725,000 and $740,000 according to Bob Callier, administrator.

The Hormel Institute in Austin shares the proceeds with the University of MN Cancer Research Center and Mayo Clinic.

In the 29 years of the LACA fundraising, $1,015,000 has been raised. Amazingly, $1 million of that amount was raised the last nine years.

There were 43 bidders sitting in the audience at 2 a.m. on the Sunday it ended. When the auction began, the previous Friday night, 377 bid numbers had been claimed.

The LACA potluck appreciation supper, held Sunday Jan. 21 at Post No. 105, brought together some of the people responsible for another successful fundraising year.

So many faces, so many stories. All connected by cancer.

After expressing thanks to all for their help, the volunteers went back to work.

Once again, they proved it’s always better to give than receive.  Haitian relief today, another 12 months of cancer research tomorrow.  There’s always an outstretched hand waiting for help.

And let’s end with some words of wisdom from Larry the Cable Guy:

1. A day without sunshine is like night.

2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.

9. Support bacteria. They’re the only culture most people have.

10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

14. OK, so what’s the speed of dark?

15… When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.

16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.

19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

20. Why do psychics have to ask you your name?

21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, ‘What the heck happened?’

22. Just remember — if the world didn’t suck, we would all fall off.

23. Light travels faster than sound. That’s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

24. Life isn’t like a box of chocolates. It’s more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.